finding freedom the Sufi way ....

I came across this interesting article on a topic that has been whirling around in my head for few days ...... I claim no credit for the text, yet I relate so much to it.


Our thoughts have their own power and gravitation. A single positive thought could uplift you, while another negative thought could pull you down. The thoughts have the power to imprison our consciousness - and they often do.

Real freedom is not only from negative thoughts, but the thought process itself. That happens when we are able to witness them, when we become a witnessing consciousness. Sufis have a very powerful method of whirling meditation which can give us a taste of this ultimate freedom. They say that just as the Earth whirls on its axis continually and everything moves along with it, god is the centre of this Universe. Whirling is a method of meditation to connect with this divine centre, one of the most ancient of techniques and probably one of the most powerful.. So much so, that even one experience can change your life for ever...

A must try .... some day.

company

Listening in
On the lilting music,
A tiny bob,
A swift hop
on the ledge.
Sharp black eyes
peering in.

A crested bulbul,
On my balcony.

As I watched,
It moved
From end to end.
Almost as if
in dance.

A tilt of appreciation,
A hop again.
Just as the strains
neared an end.
As if to thank.
and then
Away...

I shared
My afternoon today
With Enya
and a little black bulbul...

.........thank you................

It has been so long

Since our last goodbye.

Thinking of you

Still brings to mind

The lines from a song,

"You touched my life

I touched the sky"

Time

Cannot fade away

What you meant to us.

We feared

We loved you more.

The stern look

That could change

To a soft smile

In the blink of an eye.

We waited patiently

for that endearing sight.

It haunts us still,

How unbelieving we were

How hurt,

when you left.

We begged

for you to stay.

Just a little while longer.

But it was not to be.

Today,

As grown men and women

We know

How you shaped us,

To be better

Than the best.

And the stern look

gives way

In our minds.

Seems endearing somehow.

We were young.

We believed,

You would meet us

someday again.

The years have dulled the pain.

of waiting .

Yet not a day

Goes by

Without a mention

of how -

You touched our lives.

We smile,

We share

Memories of you.

After all this time

We are left with

these mere words...

"Dear Sir,

Thank you............."

.

.......dedicated to the man who shaped our lives............

aural connection

Mirrors
would never know,
As well as you,
Where I am!

The senses
Telling,
Giving me away.....................

Yes this is about bonds that are unanswerable... those of the "aura connections". It is not uncommon to feel a bond with a person one is very close to, so much that it allows for them to sense each other, exactly visualize the other, their actions...etc. That is the beauty of being connected to another person so deep, that in spiritual parlance, it is talked of as "Auras connecting". But for most people, it is merely something that seems out of context with the non-physical world around us.

Most of us healers, have often used connecting aurally when working with a person, just so that it allows for us to connect at a deeper soul level and heal accordingly. But that is a conscious effort at doing so. How does one explain a bond such as this, where one can sense the other's actions, visualize and almost talk to each other without speech...thousands of miles apart? And between two people who have never met .... nothing other than Destiny and a beautiful soul connection.

What is the Aura that we speak of?
An aura is a field of subtle, luminous radiation surrounding a person or object. These are always around the person radiating outwards ... when two like auras meet, it calls for instant chemistry. But what is intriguing is the aura connections from great distances. It would be sad to classify this beautiful sensory perception as paranormal, especially with people who have it naturally, are not using it against another and yet can reach out to people they may wish to. No, it is not telepathy, since this has nothing to do with the connection of only the mind. It is something that only be explained as something that can be 'sensed with the senses'.

A connection, such as this goes to great lengths to establish long-lasting relationships , since the bond can never be broken.

It cherishes
reassures.....
...yet again.

autumn beginnings...............

The sound of drums

Heralded in the morning,

To a new beginning.

Did the plume

Sway to the beats, just so,

Or did I merely dream it all?

Conches blowing,

To reassure the Earth

That autumn

Follows....

The whiff

Of incense brings in the Deity

To my door.

She is splendour

She is power,

She may the beauty be.

My mind's eye

Sees her anew.

I know, she has blessed me.

Shown me the reflection of my soul.

As morning rolled

onto the night,

I find myself drawn to the drum beats again....

To ring in the joy,

I have found in thee.

Life, begins

anew.

To my own mind,

I know not

What my future will bring.

And yet,

There is hope

In the warmth of new beginnings.

friendship ..... always precious.....

Shared secrets...
giggles,
dreams,
sleepovers...

Friendship,
back then.......

Nothing changes,
much...

Still the hand
that reaches out
when you need assurance...
Still the smile
that warms your heart.....

A friend,
who knows you better
than you!

Who,
but a dear friend
can bring
joy...
in an otherwise
mundane world.

A precious bond,
making the day
beautiful...
A joy
to be around....

Never judging,
Never leaving your side...

Friendship....
now ...and always.......!!

saxophone

The uncertainty

Of waiting

Is forever like the sad strains

Of the saxophone....

Wailing

yet lyrical.

What do we seek

When the music

Reaches the inner soul

Of this song,

That is the endless wait.

Is it happiness?

Or

The comfort of our own

Peace...

A peace, we never knew

We sought.

The saxophone plays

its soulful tune...

into this waiting

heart of mine...

Have we met?

Peace...

You and I?

The crescendo peaks...

A glimpse ,

The light that shines within the tune....

Is mine.

A single moment of sheer joy.

Yes, peace,

We have met.

You and I.

a soul in pain........

Talking to a friend last night, made me realise how fragile the soul is .... and yet how resilient. The pain that is deep within, may sometimes crush the very essence of the person's being , their self-belief ....question their own good. But why should it be so? Why does the old adage of - "it gets better with time", seems like just another fuddy-duddy line some loser coined. For those of us who have lived through the pain, it may have panned out to be true, but for someone in the vortex of it just then....it feels like a bottomless pit. One claws at the ends to climb out.....but the gravel keeps slipping off.


This made me think back on why it has to begin with a process, where the forgiveness for the pain has to come from within. One has to come to terms with the root of this pain and find the strength from within to first forgive oneself. They say that there are several things one has to understand about forgiveness -

• No one can force us to forgive....it is voluntary. Only we can decide in our minds and hearts, when we can begin the process of healing by forgiving. We must remember here, that , forgiveness is perhaps the most magnanimous gesture we can make, not only to those who have wronged us, but to ourselves as well. There are times, when the pain stems from being unable to forgive oneself ... for being helpless in a situation, for maybe not having done enough for some one.... or maybe for having cared too much and thence having lost it all..... Whatever the source of the pain, the best way to deal with it, is to first understand and then deal with it, slowly.
• Forgiveness is a state of mind, a state of forgetting .... of letting go of the pain.... of choosing to move beyond.
• One cannot but wonder, if we are talking of forgiving the person who has hurt us. No. That is never the purpose of forgiving at all. When someone does us wrong, we are not expected to make believe that the wrong never happened. But that it was beyond our means to hold on to the pain of the wrong and hurt the soul. Let go of the pain of insult, being cheated, a death of a loved one where you may think you could have done more... Trust your own self in believing that you have been the best that you could...done the best that you could.... the rest was never in your control.
• Sometimes, when we constantly live with the pain of being wronged, we sometimes make decisions that are coloured by the emotional scars of that wrong. This is as good as being burdened with the guilt of having commited the wrong oneself. Often, it is heavier. Let go .... maybe have faith in someone you can trust and confide, maybe seek emotional help to deal with this pain.... but ultimately, let go.....
• When we can finally forgive - the wrong doer or even ourselves, it will lighten the burden of anger. The feeling is exhilarating.... try it.
• And yet, forgiveness does not mean love thy enemies.... Oh dear Lord! No!!! No one is required to love an enemy or wrongdoer. But do not hold onto the pain within...expunge it..and you will find that the people in question do not matter any more.
  
• Please remember, forgiveness is never easy. Because we say it is a state of mind more than anything else, it requires understanding. The process of this journey of understanding is not to force ourselves to believe that the wrong never happened.... but to not let it cloud our lives.
• It is easy to assume that forgiveness is an act of weakness. But by doing so, we are putting the people who have wronged us, in a state of power over us, while taking away from us the very essence of our own. But please remember, forgiveness is an act of strength. Each of us have our core strength..... tap as deep as you have to, but find that in yourself.

Once we understand what forgiving can do for us, we must try to analyze how to go about doing so. There maybe various ways - which are but means to an end, but unless dealt with one at a time, it goes against the basic grain of understanding the pain and dealing with it.

• Let go of the negative thoughts that get in the way of your happiness
• Uncover from within, your feelings of bitterness, hurt, betrayal, being victimized
• Let go of the anger and move on. This may also mean, anger towards oneself.
• Absorb the pain of the past without the need for apologies and revenge
• Gain inner peace through compassion, understanding and acceptance.

All this may seem like a book of knowledge being read out at a lecture, but it comes from deep within the soul of anyone who has gone through pain and learnt to deal with it , over time. This is my humble and yet sincere effort at reaching out to my friend in his time of pain. He has been through so much, and yet has the dignity within to stand up to it. He may have kept the pain deep within, covered it with a smile ..... but has he dealt with it? It is my fervent hope that some of what I have written touches a chord in him.... makes him forgive himself first and then heal in the process of forgiving the wrongs around him.

This is for you..... my friend.

Has it really been so long since I have written ......?

The past few months have gone by in a flash, it seems. The past has come back to stay in my life...enriching it !

How is it that just when the soul is at the lowest depths, it finds a way to renew its faith and thus go on to celebrate life? Is this Karma.... or is just a way of the powers that be reaching out to take us to the next step...? Of shedding the old ...embracing the new.... detachment.....? A beautiful journey , to have the courage to walk onto a new , without any regrets for what you have left behind. Sometimes, this joy comes in the form of angels, your friends.... and then again at other times, when you reach deep within yourself and seek the strength that lies within.

This takes me to something a dear friend said to me, when I needed the reassurance...

"You are connected to your biological family via old karma. When you get off the karmic cycle, the bonds of the old relationships are released. It will appear as though you are drifting away from your family and friends. This too shall pass.

After a period of time, you may develop a new relationship with them if it is appropriate. However, the relationship will be based in the new energy without the karmic attachments. "


It is time to move on.........

silence

Silence is.....

it ever golden?

or all- encompassing darkness

that swallows.....

Silence is...

stifling,

But a soft shroud

that shows nothing.

But the pain.

Silence can

be beautiful ... if seen from the inside

serene,

smiling....

forever with you.......

sometimes.......

Sometimes......


a fleeting memory
a smiling face,
a warm voice

can change your life forever....

Yes, sometimes.


(This one is dedicated to my twin soul................!)

twin souls....

Having spent a big chunk of my life reading and assimilating in my mind, the intriguing theory of soul and its manifestations, it has always remained to know what it may feel like to actually experience such a connection.

What then is that answer?

It is said in all learned scholars' writings on the topic, that souls are an imprint of God, made in his own image. That He has allowed us to be in his likeness, seems the oft-used term to assuage those restless minds that know not what they seek, but seek nevertheless. They believe that simply leaving it all to God is the answer to all their problems/ questions. It is believed by many, that if souls be the imprint of God, then we are reaching way beyond our realm to understand the workings of the Universe. Instead, if we look at God as a Supreme source of energy, instead of the myriad forms that are postulated in Hindusim (while at the same time insisting that God is one!)... there would far less conflicts in our minds. Sometimes, too much of the good thing, is probably not good for anyone! I do not mean to create conflict but my mind has severe comprehension issues where so many God and their accompanying goddesses or consorts and related rituals and special days of worship .. Guess some things don't sit well with some of us.

So then, let us quickly move away from that controversial arena and onto the different classifications of "soul"! Safer for me to dwell upon atleast!

It is believed in some theories that "monads" are the umbilical souls that keep us bound to the Higher power that is God. It remains in union with God at all times. That is our inner conscience, that always reminds us to do the right. Whether we heed that conscience is what determines our journey through this life. "Souls" on the other hand, being the projection of this very same monad, travels through the physical realm that is the earth and the physical living world to gain experiences and establish identity. Ultimately the soul is the repository of all our cumulative experiences across lifetimes. This is what we tap into, when we try to tap into glimpses of past-lives during regression. What we see in "70mm full blown colour" , as my friend Nisha loves to say, is but the memories of those lives lived, experiences gathered. So, if we say the souls are projections, then we also must appreciate that maybe there are meant to be more than one such imprint of the same. Now , I know this seems like strange rantings, but in fact it is believed that souls sometimes over lifetimes split. And then again, there are souls that are actual mirror-images of each other. This may happen either because of the literal twin-theory that holds true in the physical realm too, which leads to a pair of souls that are so alike that they may live apart for most of their lives, but if and when they do meet they immediately seem to know each other, they can sense each others presence no matter how far apart they are, they are able to think alike or better still fight and squabble like twin-siblings do...! It also comes as a jolt when the first contact happens.... such a turmoil as never before.... draining... calming and then ultimately, levelling out of emotions.

That is the comfort level... totally unexplainable by medical science and existentialist theorists....!

Some may compare or equate twin-souls with soul-mates. That, to my mind, is another chapter altogether of the journey of our souls...........

essence

Never truly have I been religious..... nor do I have any illusions about my knowledge of the realm of spirituality. So what is it that has all along drawn me to the Dargah at Ajmer, I've often wondered. I've asked myself that often, but the answers are never compelling enough to be satisfied with. It never fails to amaze me for the simple reason that having no place in my heart and mind to follow any form of ritualistic practices, hence the concerted efforts to avoid typical places of worship, especially temples, I have been the bohemian who prefers to be left alone to reach the Higher Powers that may be... in my own roundabout way. Frankly, I think regimented rituals scare me, for the sense of self-worth takes a nose-dive given that I do not follow the mantras, neither can I whole-heartedly follow any of the do-this-after-this-and then-that.... pattern that these visits corner me into. It nearly stifles whatever feeling of remnant devotion I may have.

But it is the same "not-the-places-of-worship" me, who every once in awhile has this intense need to "go home" , so to speak! When I think back of when this fascination with Chisti began.... it would probably go back to the sixth grade or so, when the history book we used, gave me the first insight on the teachings of Khwaja Moinuddin Chisti and his efforts at popularising Sufism in India. It was probably just a few paragraphs on religions in India, with the Khwaja's teachings of Sufism being termed as an amalgamation of the Hindu and Islamic tenets that went on to spread Universal Love.... but what stays with me from that age, is the fact that people of all faiths seem to relate to the Saint. It is nearly 800years that he has been gone..... but his sayings still ring true in so many of our lives till date. Probably the simplicity of his teachings, that made it easier for all and sundry to follow him.... or was it simply his compassion and the sense of belonging that he brought into their lives. To the faithful and afflicted souls invoking his blessing, he has ever been a never-failing source of moral strength and spiritual enlightenment. Apart from the common people, even the mighty kings of India, both Hindu and Muslim, have paid submissive homage to the great saint and have sought his miraculous aid to solve their problems.

There has been an old adage attached to the followers of Khwaja Chisti - that one may plan and think and want to visit his dargah to seek his divine intervention into your life........ but the visit never can materialise until the Khwaja himself calls for your soul to visit! If that be true... I consider myself truly blessed. For whenever I have truly asked to visit, I have made my way there.... So even the worst streak of scepticism in me stops to question this supposed illogical belief! But, isn't it always easier to believe that you went simply because you are "blessed" enough to be called by Him.

Whatever be the case, as always, I landed at Ajmer by road from Delhi last Saturday..after a lot of heart-burn and anxiety of nearly not making it! The initial plan had been to leave on Friday morning........ things did not really pan out for that day. One may ask why Friday? The answer is very simple in my head... The Friday prayers are considered the most auspicious and hence I have to reach ! Well, Friday came and went... and I stewed in anxiety... somewhere along the way it also steeled my resolve to leave any-which-way on the Saturday, for that would be my last possible chance to do so. So until nearly 6.45 a.m. ... when I set off... I wasn't truly sure I was going to make it this time. So was the age-old belief to be tested at last! Did I not really receive the "call"? On reaching Ajmer, at the foothills of the Taragarh in Rajasthan.... as before I was awash with the sense of deja vu ...... but of course I had been there before... but why the strong sense of bonding with the place... how is it that my otherwise ridiculous sense of direction never fails me there.... But this visit was after nearly 8years and all I had with me was an old visiting card of one of the Khadims and a name that I remembered, one of the sons of the revered Khadim, Salman. So when the rest of the visitors were being accosted to be escorted to the Dargah by the stall owners ... I asked to be put onto Salman. Salman was tracked down and the rest followed like a dream......... Salman remembered me from my previous visits, asked after my parents and my son.... asked why I had not visited for so long! Either that was very smart talking or then again, was it? So I am taken past the maddening throngs that were converging at the entrance.... Oh, incidently that Saturday was some very auspicious date on the history of the Dargah... and definitely more than the Friday that had past! That is about all that registered in my mind from what Salman was saying as I controlled my sense of panic and claustrophobia jostling through the sea of humanity. It was a battle of elbows, almost literally so. In that adrenaline that followed, it felt great to be escorted aside .. a little away from the crowds... my offerings organised... and then the crowd parted for my benefited as I walked into the inner sanctum. All along it never left my mind that I had actually made it there.....!

So blessings sought......... with the right companion by my side………….the traditional prayers said.... the main chadar from the mazhar to cover my head and seek the blessings.... this has always felt special to me! for I am not a celebrity or VIP to deem such attention.......... but I guess I am blessed after all!

As before, I have returned with a sense of inner calm and a sense of purpose, fortified with the blessings, I guess. Whatever it may be... I know it will hold me through my upheavals or my "bad days" and give me a sense of peace on the "good".

The more I learn about the ‘essence of things’ the more I wonder........